Approaching A New Partner About Your Relationship

It all starts off with that shy, knowing glance across the dinner table. Your knees are lightly touching, your hands are intertwined and you know that this is the night you will be taking this relationship to the next level. You feel so comfortable with him and you know this is not just another fly-by-night relationship, so why is your heart beating so fast? Your legs are shaved, your bed sheets are freshly laundered, you have breath mints in your purse, so why the sudden anxiety? You have not had “the condom talk,” that’s why. Approaching a new sexual partner about using condoms can be nerve-wracking, to say the least, so how do you do it gently and swiftly?

For many, talk about using condoms before beginning a sexual relationship is like ordering a drink before the meal - which go hand in hand and progress in a certain order. The thinking is if you are comfortable enough to have an intimate sexual relationship should be comfortable enough to open the issue of condoms. For others, the condom talk is more anxiety-ridden by the sexual act itself. These people may feel that if you bring the issue of condoms, he insinuates that the other person is promiscuous and therefore have no idea of the Netherlands, where regions have been and with whom.

If you are in the latter category and are hesitant to address the issue of condoms, here are some things to consider.

* Sexually transmitted diseases can be transferred between partners, with no evidence of a sexually transmitted disease is present. Just because your partner is not oozing sores on his penis when you're about to have sex does not mean it is infected with an STD.

* Please note that the posters had when you were at school that read, You're not just sleeping with someone, you sleep with all those who have slept with (and anyone who slept with the person and so on and so on). That is an unfortunate truth. Because you never know the sexual history of their current partner in the past the partners (and partners), it is always best to play it safe ... consistent.

* When used correctly, condoms are more than 99% effective in preventing pregnancy and the spread of many sexually transmitted diseases.

So now you know why you need to have the condom talk, but how is it? It is best not to wait until they are both in bed naked and seconds of real relationships. It is likely that you have suggested to take the relationship to another (sexually), so until that happened at that time. Remember, this is not a discussion about whether or not to use condoms. If you want to have safe sex, it is imperative to use condoms. Rather, the debate is to alert your partner that you will not be having sex unless a condom. Be firm in your decision and know how to overcome the objections that he / she may have on condom use (ie, the feeling is not the same with condoms), being knowledgeable about condoms. May never be a perfect time to open the chat, so take that step to lead the discussion. Your health is glad she did.

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